Category: World News

Dear US, Keep Your Land—We’ll Keep Our Zimbabwe!

The United States has placed Zimbabwe in the “yellow” travel category—oh no, how will we ever survive without the privilege of scrubbing their dishes and driving their taxis? Well, dear Uncle Sam, keep your America, and we’ll keep our Zimbabwe! Who needs stable electricity, functioning hospitals, or a thriving economy when we have ZBC telling us everything is just fine? After all, in Zimbabwe, survival is an extreme sport, and we are champions!

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