By Cde Muchapfidza Gumbomusariri
As Zimbabwe grapples with a devastating drought, the question on everyone’s mind is: “how will the government distribute food aid to the provinces?”
Well, the ruling ZANU PF party, in its infinite wisdom, like always has found an innovative solution.
Under the leadership of the hardworking Minister Ziyambi, MPs and Councillors have been tasked with a bold new initiative, helping themselves to some of the food relief supplies, using their own transport, of course, since the government has, shockingly, failed to secure any.
What a selfless, truly revolutionary gesture!
ZANU PF understands that it’s the festive season, and who can blame MPs and Councillors for wanting to make sure their preferred relatives don’t go hungry?
After all, food distribution is so much more efficient when the party’s elites are personally involved.
Of course, a few leftovers will be left for the people, but it’s all part of the plan to ensure smooth “sanitization” of the process.
This is hardly a new move for ZANU PF, a party that has long prided itself on doing the people’s work, even if that work involves more personal gain on the side.
After all, this isn’t the first time the party has been embroiled in allegations of food theft.
Remember the incident earlier this year, when an MP and a councillor were dragged to court for allegedly stealing mealie meal valued at US$12,000?
No worries, ZANU PF has stepped in to ensure that these upstanding members of the party won’t face any consequences for their actions.
You see under the Second Republic they’re the real victims here.
And let’s not forget the case of Shurugwi Councillor Tapiwa Ndawana, who was wrongly arrested for “stealing” 38 bags of maize meant for villagers.
Of course, Ndawana wasn’t stealing, he was merely storing the maize for the inevitable drought that was sure to hit in 2024.
A visionary, if you ask me.
This week, when Senator Sithabisiwe Moyo raised concerns about the delay in transporting food, Minister Ziyambi was quick to address the issue.
The solution? Let the MPs and Councillors use their own transport to move the food, ensuring that there will be no questions asked about the distribution model.
After all, who could possibly question such a flawless plan?
True patriots, Zimbabwe’s food aid crisis is in good hands, especially if those hands are holding onto some extra bags for the festive season.
Who needs transparency and accountability when there’s a revolutionary party ready to serve its people, and its relatives, so generously?
