The ZIFA Appeals Committee, last week once again proved its unwavering patriotism (and survival instincts) by upholding the Northern Region Soccer League’s decision to hand Scottland FC three points for their abandoned match against Karoi United.

The result? A smooth, drama-free coronation for Scottland FC as league champions or at least, that’s the official narrative.

For those keeping score, the match was abandoned in the 88th minute with the teams deadlocked at 1-1.

But come on, who in their right mind would challenge the football dynasty of Pedzai Sakupwanya, one of President Ruka Chivende’s golden boys?

A Legacy of Winning At All Costs

Pedzai Sakupwanya is not just a football enthusiast; he’s a man who embodies the “win-or-else” ethos of the Second Republic.

Need a reminder? Just ask the former opposition MP for Mabvuku, Phibion Kufahakutizwe.

After daring to defeat Pedzai in the 2023 harmonized general elections, Kufahakutizwe found himself swept away by the Sengezo Tshabangu recall tsunami.

And that was just the warm-up.

In the subsequent by-election, Pedzai allegedly had a hand in the brutal demise of Bishop Tapfumanei Masaya and ensured Kufahakutizwe wasn’t even allowed to contest.

It’s no wonder Karoi United, bless their naive little hearts, had no chance.

A Trophy Promised Before the Final Whistle

If anyone doubted Scottland FC’s destiny, let’s not forget Pedzai’s preemptive trophy presentation to his father, President Ruka Chivende, at State House.

This was well before the league officially concluded. Was it presumptuous?

Perhaps. But when you’re backed by the ruling party and wield the influence of a “big investor,” presumptions quickly become reality.

The ZIFA Appeals Committee clearly understood the stakes.

Overturning the decision to award Scottland those crucial three points would have handed the title to MWOS, a white-owned team.

A team of colonial residue beating the son of the soil?

Laughable! Even entertaining such a possibility might have invited consequences as dark as Zimbabwe’s nightly power outages.

Welcome to the Premier Soccer League

Scottland FC’s promotion to the Premier Soccer League was a foregone conclusion.

What Karoi United and MWOS didn’t realize is that they weren’t competing for a title they were participating in a choreographed drama with a script penned by Pedzai himself.

To the football fans across the country, take note: in the Second Republic, the beautiful game has a new rulebook.

Justice isn’t found on the pitch but in loyalty to power.

And if you think otherwise, well, prepare to pay the price ask Karoi, MWOS, or poor Kufahakutizwe.

So, congratulations, Scottland FC. The Premier Soccer League awaits your arrival.

And to Pedzai, a true son of the soil and champion of innovation in both politics and sports well played.

Or should we say, well maneuvered?