By Cde Honest Vhura Hombe
Zimbabweans across all walks of life on and offline have lashed out against the so-called Luxury Train is a spectacle of mediocrity.
From chicken buses to chicken trains, the Comrades have truly outdone themselves.
Outside, polished metal glimmers like a billboard, but inside are vintage sofas straight from a Rhodesian dining room.
Loose chairs wobble as the train moves, apparently it’s a “revolutionary safety feature,” according to NRZ geniuses.
One could almost hear the ghost of sekuru vachiti, “Ukagara pedyo nehari inopisa, zvipfeko zvako zvinonhuwawo utsi.”
Journalists were treated like royalty, lunch packs from Pick n Pay and free rides bought them five-star reviews.
Standards and ethics were of course tossed out the window for the love of country.
The train is less a transport project, more a political metaphor for the ZANU PF government that it is flashy, empty, and all show.
Meanwhile, reality bites.
People die waiting for dialysis at Parirenyatwa, 17 new machines gathering dust, all while the
President Ruka Chivende claims glory for the grand unveiling.
Barbra Rwodzi hugging her subordinates was presented as triumph, but anyone with eyes saw a theatre of the absurd.
The rushed launch, timed with the Sanganayi Tourism Expo, even included a hastily introduced Harare-to-Mutare flight to feign seriousness.
The ruling party’s shadowy X appendage, ZANU PF Compatriots, could not stomach the embarrassment.
No amount of spin, no state media parade could salvage this flop.
The citizens see what everyone knows: the train is stone-age, overpriced at $60 from Harare to Mutare, with no bar, no comfort—just vibes and mediocrity.
If this was meant to be a speed train, the nation might have forgiven the theatrics.
True Patriots, this is of course a slow-moving relic parading as luxury.
Zimbabweans are left shaking their heads, muttering: “Chidembo hachizvinyimwi kunhuwira”—even the buffalo knows when nonsense smells bad.
The Luxury Train is more than transport; it is a lesson in governance.
Flash over function.
Show over service.
Ironically, while the ruling elite smile for cameras, the people bear the cost, both in cash and dignity.
